It is a well-known fact that almost 93 percent of human communication is non-verbal. That’s why body language is so important, and it can tell you a lot about a person you are with or meeting for the first time. We’ll discover the secrets of body language to use that tool to avoid miscommunication at work, home, or at school.
When you meet someone for the first time, a person will likely have to look at you and shake your hand while being introduced. And those couple of seconds will right away tell you who did you just met.
Look me in the eyes
Body language is many things, but the first key point you need to watch is eye contact. If you get immediate eye contact, you know you are dealing with an outgoing type right away. So, you probably just met a D or an I person.
Secondly, keep your attention on the handshake. Steady eye contact with a firm handshake tells you that this is a D person. Granted, you might have met some D personalities in your life who were looking everywhere but in your direction. If they are not interested in the topic or current activity, Ds will do that. But, if they are engaged, they will be right there penetrating your eyes.
All of this will be accompanied by pointing. Ds do not shy away from delegating, and they will point in the direction of a person they want something out of very often. While doing so, they will move fast as if they are impatient, which is another clear clue of a High D.
When you notice all these body language characteristics, remember that High Ds dislike being casually touched. They are not huggers, not even when a big day is in question. While they will sometimes get up in your face and cross personal space boundaries, they do not handle physical touch very well. Most you can expect from them is a pat on the back.
There is always room for comedy
D’s aren’t the only ones who use big gestures and eye contact. You can expect this from a High I as well, and however, you will notice a much friendlier posture from an I right off the bat.
Unlike Ds, who will point at people, Is will use their hands to communicate and keep open palms. They rarely cross their arms and like to keep their hands on the side of their body.
Their amusing mentality and posture will give them away because the need for people to like them is at their core. You are definitely dealing with a High I if you meet someone for the first time and get a joke or two, funny punchlines, or even a little stand-up comedy performance.
Cool Hand Luke
As mentioned at the beginning of this text, eye contact is the first point that will help you decide whether a person is outgoing or reserved. The second crucial part is gestures. If they are big gestures, motioning with their hands a lot and moving around, that tells you they are expressive. However, if they lack minimal gestures or have none at all, you are working with a reserved style: S or a C.
Ss will be very cool, to the point where they don’t try to stand out. The way they speak and move is general; they are welcoming and friendly, but a lot of that is set to mute. Their gestures are reassuring, gentle, and harmonious. Their face will be a poker face. If you can’t see anything in their expression and struggle to figure out what they are thinking, that’s an excellent clue that they are a High S.
Another tell for an S is if they ask good questions, but they sit there, nod, and listen. They are, at their core, great listeners and will make you feel great after the conversation due to that. No drama, just listening and helping others.
Turn that frown upside down
Another member of we-don’t-gesture-a-lot-team is an S personality style. What will differentiate them from an S is they will stick to the facts and data in their conversation. They won’t make much eye contact, and you can recognize them by a scowl they have. You might think that the person you just met is unhappy with what they are hearing but most likely: they are an S personality. Due to being data-driven, they think a lot while listening and assessing everything all the time. Because of concentration on this, their face automatically frowns. Those frowns are normal. That unemotional side of things is kind of where they live. Don’t worry; you are doing okay (unless you tried any sort of physical contact. Just like Ds, they are not good with that).
Keep in mind that somebody can fake a lot of body language. We are taught that a firm handshake is essential in the corporate world, so that alone doesn’t have to tell you a lot about the person. A High C can learn to smile broadly and give a firm handshake when meeting someone as a sign of respect and authority. So, that’s why it’s essential to look at the whole picture.
Also, as body language says a lot about others, it says a lot about you. And you can learn how to manipulate it to get a message you wish to convey across. What can help you is lessons from Tudor Alexander. He is a professional ballroom dancer and coach who knows the importance of body language more than anyone. You can listen to his advice HERE.